Teacher! Teacher!

For my teaching observation assignment I was assigned to P. Kindergarten (I use P. instead of _____ so that this blog won't show up in google searches) where I would be pollinating the minds of 3-4 year old Thais to be... Now, it's been a while since I was 4 years old, but I remembered a few lessons that were hits with me: John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt... wheels on the bus... duck, duck, goose... you get the idea.



At P. Kindergarten, we start every morning with jazzercise to a remix version of "I'm a Barbie Girl", followed by yoga and meditation to Enya. You can't go wrong with this formula. I only wished that I grew up in such a trendy Kindergarten. This place was totally decked out with every piece of climbable plastic toy imaginable, an outdoor swimming pool, and even karate instructors... because teaching kids how to fight teaches them discipline... or something like that.

The kids were pretty bright in that they learned Thai, English, and Chinese. Yup, 3 languages at 4 years old! Every class is also equiped with a Thai aid who walks around with a stick made out of colored tape and whips kids arms or asses if they act up or get out of line. Due to the sheer fear of the Thai aids, the kids were extremely well behaved for the most part... until the aid would leave. As soon as the kids realized the drill sergeant was gone from room they quickly erupted into a jumping, dancing, screaming, plethora of 4 year old. My initial reaction to this was to clap my hands twice very loud, but this only provoked them to copy me. 4 years old and they already knew how to mock me. This would last for a good 2 minutes until the aid came running back to the rescue fighting her way through the crowd with her trusty.. tape... stick.. thing.



Despite moments of wanting to peg a few of the little runts with a dodge ball, these kids were great. In the end, we made it through the alphabet, the numbers 1-50, fruits and veggies, household appliances, and the difference between "Teacher" and "Teeshirt". It was incredibly cute how eager these kids were to learn and how well they spoke English at such a young age.

After 2 weeks, and with a final Asian peace sign, I said "Sawadee Krab" to my wee Thai friends and booked it on up to Bangkok... time for the real deal.

Pattaya, "the extreme city."

Upon leavin Koh Chang we made our way to Pattaya... "The Extreme City", as dubbed by a billboard upon entering the city. Pattaya can pretty much be summed up as Las Vegas on steroids. If you have any un-christian addictions then you can rest assured they can be met in Pattaya. Dirty massage parlors lined with skantly clad dressed teenage girls at the doors?... check. Lady boys stopping you walking down the street to ask "you want eat meat big boy?"... check. Taxi drivers offering "marijuana cigarrette?"... check. Thai kickboxing matches inside open air pool bars with go go dancers grinding down strip polls?.... CHECK!

Pattaya is easily one of the most un-authentic cities in Thailand. The westerner population likely matches the local population. This is due almost entirely to the western male population that dominates the city. For every thai girl walking around in homemade jean thongs (jongs?) there are at least 2 western men following her around. Pattaya exists for the sole purpose of prostitution, drugs, go go bars, and western men living out all of the illegal activities that are so frowned upon back home. So how did we end up in this place? Well, this is the lovely little town that Language Corps decided to pick for their Thai headquarters! Yup, we were going to be spending the next 2 weeks observational teaching and going through cultural training within a very un-cultured sin city.

Island Hoppers

Cambodia has finally come to a conclusion, complete with a grand finale birthday party for Phil at Elsewhere Bar. After taking a 2am taxi home and getting a good 3 hours of sleep, Allison and I woke up at the butt crack of dawn to endure the 12 hour tuk tuk, bus, minibus, ferry, and taxi journey that awaited us. Why were we enduring such varied modes of southeast Asian transportation??... because we were headed to the island of Koh Chang in Thailand! That's right friends, we had finally sent our last goodbyes to Cambodia and were off to Thailand to dabble in the life of a beach bum.



We arrived to Koh Chang late and went straight to our beach bungalow for much needed zzzzzz's. It was dark and a bit foggy on our arrival so we didn't even bother to check out the scenery. This made the experience all the more better. I can't describe the feeling we had of waking up in the morning and stepping out of our bungalow onto the deserted white sand beaches of Koh Chang. It was truely badass (for lack of a better expression).



We spent the day relaxing on the beach, taking an elephant trek through the inner rainforest, and swimming in the crystal clear water of the island's coast. That night we ventured down the shore to check out the Koh Chang nightlife scene. I believe "Euro" is the best way to describe it. The one bar we went to shared the same cocktail buckets and Beer Leo pitchers that one can expect in Thailand, but was pumping out the "Euro" house tunes complete with a fire twirling show.



I ended up getting very sick the next day, likely due to some sketchy Cambodian stir fry that I partook in on the bus ride down, so the rest of the Koh Chang trip wasn't as magical as anticipated. Luckliy it was just the 24 hour bug. After a long, nauseous Sunday morning trip, we said goodbye to life as island dwellers and hello to our home for the next 2 weeks - Pattaya, Thailand... but that my friends is another posting altogether....

Cambodia?... You mean Gam-poo-cha?

Welcome friends, family members, co-workers, random internet stalkers. This is to be the first entry of Fried Sweet Bananas, my stomping ground for brief glimpses into life in Thailand and Southeast Asia. For those of you who don't already know, I recently took a hiatus from my job as an online course management software guru and packed my bags and sailed on over to Thailand where I am teaching English and Mathematics, and indulging in beaches, boulders, and bamboo shoots.

My travels began in Phnom Penh, Cambodia where I was trained in the art of Sunday evening jazercise, hacky sack with a shuttlecock, and happy pizza. Happy pizza was of particular surprise to me. What is happy pizza you ask?... Well... imagine happy brownies, except pizza. Phnom Penh (and Cambodia in general) is littered with restaurants blatently advertizing these (not so) innocent delights. The odd thing about this is that drugs, and marijuana in particular are illegal in Cambodia. So how are these restaurants allowed to advertise such blatently illegal cuisine? It just gives you an idea of how corrupt and lazy the whole police force is in Cambodia.



Besides the questionable food selection I actually found Phnom Penh to be quite enjoyable. Most of my time was spent TESOL training at Panasatra University, but I was still able to find some time to explore and mingle with the locals. Some of my favorite memories include playing sai (essentially hacky sack with a badminton shuttlecock) in the park for hours, drinking vodka buckets and Ankor pitchers with the group in Siem Reap, and relaxing with a "JD Extreme" by the pool at Elsewhere Bar. In the end, my Cambodian experience was a success. I met some really great people through my TESOL cours and would certainly reccommend Phnom Penh as a great place to visit if you are looking for cheap prices, an authentic experience, incredible temples, and "lax" rules.